You taught me a lesson i didn't want to learn

I sit in the doctor's office, my fingers tapping against the soft denim of my skirt. The waiting is always the hardest.

I can't seem to get past the first track of "No more shall we part" by Nick cave and the Bad Seeds and not only because it reminds me of Blue Eyes. Listening to it is a constant reminder that i'm in a place i can barely call home. I'm here but i'm not here. I'm holding myself together until i send my application off to Sydney Uni.

I long for, I long for
I long for my home
I long for a land where
No man was ever known

With no neurosis
No psychosis
No psychoanalysis
And no sadness

I'll pick up the pieces,
I'll carry on somehow
Tape the broken parts together
And limp this love around
-PJ Harvey, 'The darker days of me and him'