don't let go

week 3 of autumn has been just a bit stressful with visas and the like. but once i've cleared my medical tomorrow, everything will be in place and i won't have to worry about leaving. it's been hot the past couple of days and i want the cold to return. leaves continue to change colour. and we've discovered a great little vietnamese restaurant in newtown, thanks to christine my flatmate. good, cheap food. yum. i had some rice vermicelli with beef last night before going to the arts and crafts store to get a foam board, glue and an eraser for jon. he and i went to the beach yesterday evening and it was beautiful. the water was cold and the surfers were out, as were many dogs. we sat on the sand and talked till it got colder and then we left for dinner at the vietnamese place. how nice is it to just sit and talk, feet buried in the sand, the smell of saltwater masking the odour of fear that sits heavily on my heart. it was good for my soul. i baked some chocolate and banana bread with big chunks of dark chocolate. best loaf i've ever made i reckon. have been having it for tea the past couple of days. making cups of soy lattes at home. bemoaning the last of the longish days. tomorrow, i continue searching for my wedding dress. i saw one online that i really loved and i'm hoping to try it on in the store tomorrow. it's got lace, ribbon and a train. just so feminine and pretty. apart from that, life has been pretty quiet. thinking about spring flowers and new york in midsummer.