Oh Lord, please send someone to care

Weddings and children have been making me weepy of late. Strangely enough, i feel like i've finally reached a point where i'm truly happy with the way things have been progressing in my life and have no great desire to be part of a couple or to have a baby.
Well, ok. Maybe that's not the whole truth.
If i happen to meet him and know with all my heart that he's it, i can see myself getting married. Maybe even in the next two years.
But i guess what i mean is this- i'm happy and content with the woman i've become. I'm happy being Genevieve, idiosyncracies and all. And since they say you can't love someone else till you've learned to love yourself, i think i'm now ready to love.

I work part-time as a nanny and look after two boys- Abel, 4, and Lars, 21 months. Two blonde, curly haired kids who are just so precious that i want to hold them close to me and never let go. This afternoon, as Lars was taking his nap, Abel sat on my lap and we watched "Blue's Clues" together. Portly, the cat, had his head on my calf. For a moment, i wished this was my life. I wished i lived in that house. I wished that was my kid who was on my lap. I wished Portly was my cat (and i'm not even a big fan of cats).

Just as suddenly as the moment had come, it went.
And all that was left was a yearning heart.