I tried so hard

I don't understand why it's so difficult sometimes. This morning, i made myself go out for breakfast. To do something that would make me happy. To forget. I hate that it's my rest day and instead of resting, i'm annoyed, angry, restless and upset. How is it that another person can make me feel this way? And why is it that i can't look beyond this and let it go.

Next year, i'm determined to go for a conference in New York. I'll work hard and get myself a place there. Things will change for me.