I have moved!

Dear friends,

I have finally made the move to Wordpress! Please come join me at my new home: genevievejohn.com

I can't wait to see you there!

With love,
Genevieve

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seasons change

The heaters have to be turned on at night. In the day, scarves and gloves protect from the cold. Summer seems far away now and i can't believe that a few months ago, i walked to the beach in a tank top, shorts, slippers and hat. It is hard for me to see the days getting shorter and shorter. This week, i've had to turn on the lights in the house at 4pm.

The upside to all this of course is the food: breakfast out with my husband-coffee, hot chocolate, banana bread and sourdough with a poached egg, baked beans and chorizos- on Tuesday morning before he works from home for the day. Pumpkin soup with a dash of allspice and nutmeg for dinner. A quince and pear crumble for dessert this Friday. All serve to offer comfort for cold bodies.

Today, i met Jena for coffee. I have come to rely on our weekly catch-ups to keep me on track with my life. I need someone whom i can talk to about my relationship with Jonathan knowing that it will not be part of next week's gossip session. I need someone to help me on this journey that is sometimes difficult and who will not judge or persecute. So, for rekindled friendship, i am grateful.

I asked Jena if i could please take some photos of her at the beach this afternoon after coffee, The afternoon light was delicious and she is a beautiful subject. We only had five minutes but it was worth it. I felt happier and so much more in tune with myself after our little session.

And that's how i know that photography is a big part of my life. I love it so and i feel excited after to see how the photos turned out. I've got an eye for good shots and lighting and i think with some studying, i may actually be quite proficient with the technicalities. In the meantime, i must save for a camera. The Canon DSLR i have been using for the past few weeks was on loan from a friend and tomorrow, i must return it.

But in a short time, it has revealed to me what i already know but found hard to believe- that i can follow my passions; that i can be good at many things; that nothing is impossible.

Somewhere there is a place where we belong

We're talking about moving to the country in the future- wide open spaces, a big house, planting our own flowers and vegetables, a porch, our children being able to run around freely, seeing the sky stretched out into forever.

I cannot wait.

In the meantime we go to the cafe. We have chai and some toasted pear and raspberry bread with butter. We talk. We take photographs. We read books on interior design. We dream. And we have faith that our dreams will come true. In the meantime, we also plant pansies and more herbs for the shared garden in the back. The smell of fresh earth and the act of planting under the afternoon sun remind me of what is to come.

those things that are simple and true

It's been quite a week, battling with the voices in my head that tell me the dreams for my life will never be fulfilled. Some days it's easier to deal with them; refute them. Other days, not so.

When we went to the Blue Mountains two Saturdays ago, we found a place that seemed to belong to another world- autumn leaves strewn everywhere, a stream, a wooden log table and bench, quiet. It was 'the woods' i had read about in books as a child. There was something magical about this place and i imagined having this as my backyard. A place to go to when i needed to escape; a tyre swing to swing into the heavens above; seeing my reflection in the water below.

Yesterday i watched 'Made of honour', only because it had Patrick Dempsey in it. $9 well spent if only for those eyes and that smile. The movie itself was mediocre. It was nice getting a McDreamy fix in the middle of the week though. Only four days till Sunday when Grey's airs.

When the previews started (i like to go to movies early to see previews), the one for 'Sex and the City' came up. Don Henley's 'The heart of the matter' was the background track playing, except it was a female singer singing it. Today, i found out that it was India Arie whose music i love. Since buying it on itunes, i have been playing it on repeat. It's so good. And i can't wait for the movie to come out!

Dinner last night was beautiful- toasted turkish bread and a lovely creamy camembert for starters. Then a tuna and olive pasta with fresh herbs and a glass of red wine.

Saying grace with my husband before eating. Intimate conversations with lots of laughter thrown in just because. Watching the Gilmore Girls together (he pretended not to be interested but i could tell he was). Being carried to the bath. My body cocooned in his, feet tangled up together as we fell alseep.

There are so many good things to look forward to.

Autumn in the Blue Mountains

We made another trip to the Blue Mountains last weekend as one of my two favourite aunties was here visiting me for a week. We had the bestest time taking the scenic drive along Bells line of road (what a strange but lovely name for a road) and visiting Leura which was filled with the most beautiful Parisian-style homeware stores. Saturday was also the first day in weeks that it was sunny and there was not a cloud in the sky as we walked merrily down the streets together, exploring a different town and bathing in the beauty of autumn.

drawn to you

It is still raining. All i can think to do is sit in bed and read with a cup of tea on the table beside me. Currently, i'm reading Anne Lamott's Traveling Mercies and Anne Bartlett's Knitting. They keep me well occupied.

(I dream of red Maple leaves falling to the ground all around me. I do.)

On food and nostalgia

Yesterday, after baking some bread, i decided to try making halva, a dessert often made in India and which my grandmother and auntie faithfully made every year to usher in the Indian new year.

(Lightly toast 2 cups of semolina and set aside. Brown 1 cup of cashews in olive oil and set aside. Bring 4 cups of water to the boil and then add 7-9 tablespoons of caster sugar and some saffron powder to the water. Remove from stove. In a saucepan over medium heat, melt about 50g of butter or ghee. When melted, add in 1-2 teaspoons of ground cardamon. At this point, you should get a wonderful aroma. If not, add in more cardamon. Stir in the toasted semolina and mix well. Then slowly add the sugar water, making sure to stir well simultaneously to avoid lumps forming. Add the cashews and stir. Once thickened, remove from heat and place in a 8 x 8 dish. Flatten with the back of a spoon and let cool. Eat with some sweet tea.)

It made me feel very close to my grandmother and my auntie as i cooked this, knowing that they had cooked it many times before. As the smell of the cardamon hit me, i was taken back to my auntie's kitchen where all sorts of sweet things were made with love. As i had my first bite of the halva, i could almost see myself in her kitchen, sitting at the table as she cut me piece after piece to eat.