But i continue learning

Another day spent chasing away the wretched flies but i'm now sitting at my desk in my lovely not-so-little room with an apple strudel with vanilla ice-cream and milo next to me. I thought i'd put up another picture that makes me smile (and not just because we all look quite beautiful). This one is of my two favourite girls, Sarah and Ingrid, and me at Narabeen, which is one of the Northern Beaches in Sydney. These girls are planning my birthday celebration for me and all i have to do is decide who i want at the celebration and then turn up. Bliss.
I cannot believe that i've made friends since i arrived in Sydney eight (has it only been eight?) months ago. Part of the reason leaving was so difficult was because i was sure i would spend months sitting in front of the televsion, eating biscuits and weeping from loneliness that has always threatened to steal a piece of my heart.
How grateful am i for all that didn't happen.

Ingrid and I met up for a soy mocha this evening and the day got a whole lot brighter simply by being in her presence and soaking in her wisdom. I'm so glad she's in my life and i'm in hers. Friends, good friends, make a place
H O M E.

A stranger's light comes on slowly

Hayden and Mattie


This picture always makes me smile, especially after a day like today where most of Sydney could be seen flagging their arms wildly around them as they tried to shoo away the mosquitoes which were out in full force. I was torn between being annoyed as i itched and shooed and being amused because really, it was pretty funny seeing everyone on the streets act the way we did today.
But i come home and see this picture and something inside of me just melts. Hayden, i can speak to about the silliest things. Mattie is so sweet about giving me lifts home and buying me hot chocolates. Hayden's the noisy one. Mattie's the quiet one. They both have beautiful homes. They're both cute. But most of all, they're men of God and that is the most attractive bit.
This picture reminds me of my husband list, which i'm not even embarrassed to admit i have. I know what i'm looking for in a man and and no, i'm not looking for a perfect man. I don't even care if you're a pilot and you want to take me flying. (Sad but true- some man did indeed ask me that on Sunday.)
I'm just looking for Mr. Perfect For Me.

And I cannot wait to meet him.

Take my love when all that you can see is the raging sea all around us

At about 5pm this evening, I sat on our couch in the living room (the couch with the fushcia mink blanket) with my warm custard bread and a caramel tea latte. One of my favourite CDs was playing; I put my feet up and started to browse through magazines to find a birthday cake (preferably chocolate) recipe for Matt’s birthday. I had spent the entire day cleaning our home after our housewarming party yesterday, with Sigur Ros playing in the background. I washed and swept and mopped and chuckled when I realized that the house seemed cleaner than before the party. I put the sheets and tea towels in the wash. And then I put them in the dryer.
I got up from the couch and walked into my room to retrieve yet another magazine from the growing pile next to my bed. As I stood in the doorway and noticed how the evening sun was streaming through my courtyard door (my room looks out into the courtyard. It’s perfect.) and casting shadows on my red quilt cover and how bright my entire room felt, I had a moment. In that moment, I realized that I love my home. I love what we’ve done to the house and how we’ve made it into home. I love my huge, light-filled room which is breathtaking. I love how I assembled all the furniture by myself. I love how my room reflects the me I’ve become- a beautiful, confident, happy woman who has a fondness for poetry, pretty things, photography and clothes. I love the Monmartre poster above my desk with the couple hugging chastely (the woman in the poster has her lips against the man’s neck and I think she’s whispering something- “hello” or “goodbye”. Is it a parting moment or not?). I love the pink gerberas I received from a couple of my friends for the housewarming (“Flowers for a flower”, Anita said.).
And then I had a dilemma, as you do. I couldn’t decide if I wanted to go back to the living room (with flowers and fairy lights) or stay in my room, cuddle up with my red heart cushion (“It’s for when you need a hug”, Angie said. “It’s for when I need some lovin’” I say. We laugh.) and enjoy the last hour of the spring sunshine. I stood still for a moment and then decided to bring my drink and bread into my room. I sat and reveled in the blessedness of my life.

A victim of circumstance

My wine glass is empty. I feel a little less sure, a bit more brave.
It's been a relatively good week and it was wonderful to have some time off work to spend alone and with friends. We had a long weekend this past week and some of us headed to Narabeen, one of the Northern beaches, to have brunch. I left feeling a little bit excited, a bit more curious.
On Wednesday, my hair decided it'd like some red in it.
On Thursday evening, I went to the Borders at Pitt St Mall, ignored all the books yearning to be devoured and headed to the Gloria Jean's on the second level, possibly my favourite GJ outlet in Sydney. I love that it's always relatively quiet and that the baristas are friendly and make good coffee. I had a skinny Irish Nut Creme and sat down with The Bride Stripped Bare which i had brought along with me. Beside me sat a whole bunch of clothes. Yes, i shopped. A lot. But a girl's got to have clothes. Anyways, i've decided that i'm going to be the fashionable academic. While everyone else is thinking about the content to be presented at the sociological conference in December this year, i'm thinking about all the clothes i'd have to buy to look chic. I'm going to talk about South Africa in an oh-so-cool kaftan. I'm determined to be a little more sociable, a little more put together.
Tonight, my flattie and i cooked a feast. I baked muffins for Ingrid and i to have for our picnic breakfast tomorrow and Lise cooked some chicken parmigiana, roast potatoes and salad with mustard and vinegar dressing. So Yum. For dessert, i baked some strawberry strudel. Our kitchen looks a little more messy, a little less clean. Lise and i are also the proud owners of a sofa bed and a red bathroom mat.
It's been a good week.

Our secret

It was a Friday afternoon and we had just spent the day sitting on the sand and talking. "I need to take you to Max Brenner's at Double Bay," i said, after the air started getting chilly. And so we went.
Good chocolate makes me go weak at the knees.

Now, excuse me whilst i turn down the lights, have a soy hot chocolate and watch the Gilmore Girls.